MY IQ

So you know, I've been doubting my sheer intelligence for a long time coming now and honestly, it's getting disturbing.

Deep down, I have always known I am a genius whose intelligence is beyond compare and if any of you weakling were brave enough to stand next to me, I'll burn you in my presence cause my intelligence is just too overwhelming. I'm good just like that.

And if you were to be so silly and used me as a benchmark for heaven knows what reason, I knew for the longest time, you will never overcome or at the very very least meet the mark cause your expectation is sky high darling. For the sky is the limit and yours truly is the sky.

That was my ego talking.

I mean I know I'm all that (HAHA) but I know I can't be as good as all that. I'm just too human for that.

But but but, today of all days, I've discovered my purpose here and realised my true calling. And since 4 minutes ago, life has never been any better.



I just wanna say to all you haters who thought I was stupid, you are absolutely right cause I'm stupid when compared to the Universal Genius which happens to be the paramount in the Genius sphere. And guess who's before that?

REGIONAL GENIUS a.k.a ME!!

In all honesty though, nobody thought I was stupid, at least I like to think so. I mean, they have no reason to right!! And honestly again, I'm so surprised by my IQ cause I know it's good but I didn't expect it to be finger-licking good!

This must be one of the rare days I'm smart.

My father took the test too and lets just say when he and my mother made me, I didn't just take their genes; I took their brains too.

OMG. I'm so mean! But whatever la, it's my father and his IQ is lower than mine and I expected it all along but if it were to turn out different, I'll run away from home.

My mother refused to take the test cause I think she knows what's good for her (HAHA). Ignorance is bliss la.

OMG. Somebody stop me! Somebody stop the Regional Genius! (i just had to sorry)

This is my 200th post and it's a depressing post.

Have you ever done something that inititally you felt so good about but in the end, you just wished you had not done it?

And no, I'm not talking about sex but technincally, come to think of it, it is a little like sex.

Okay I don't know, I never had sex before.

Amalina please shut up now.

Amalina, you shouldn't have gotten yourself into this whole shit la. You see, you just knew you shouldn't cause you cannot handle my emotions well and it doesn't help that the only thing you're good at is dissing.

The last time this happened it got you good. And you swore you keep a safe distance from all the drama for as long as you could. But you could not hold out for long apparently. Have you forgotten how agonising the first few days were and yet you subject yourself to such torture again?

And thank heavens this time was in the early days so things shouldn't be so ugly but know that it's painful all the same. You are so stupid; it's almost I don't recognise you.

The next time this happens, please take some time to read this post again and be reminded.

So, this year, I've aimed to buy things on my own using my own money.

Yes, thank you for having confidence in me, Mr/Ms Sceptical.

No but really, I've come to this realisation that I take things for granted way too much and it's getting unhealthy. And it doesn't help that I want everything I see everytime I'm out and it certainly does not help with all these talks on recession and people dying on 2012.

Actually, nobody said that we would die on 2012 to me but I have this strange inclination of wanting to believe the Aztech. And if they are true, why the hell am I still studying, I only have 3 years to waste my life.

I digress.

So, I've thought. 17 years on and I don't know how to cook rice, don't iron my clothes, don't wash my clothes, don't clean my room and don't give a damn about many things but still am a remarkable genius, something has to be wrong with me, no?

And thus I've come to the conclusion that each time I see something I want to buy, I'll save up and get it but of course, if my mother/father offers to get it, I will kindly obliged. Haven't you heard of filial piety?!

My short term aim to save up to get a monthly disposable contact lens. And I can easily get it in a week if I don't spend at all. So, last week I spent nothing in school and I already had $50 but but but, I bought my father a surprise birthday cake and all, so it's back to square one.

Can you say 'sacrifice'?

And this week, I've saved up too but because, actually there is no because, I spent some cash in school so by the end of the week I had $30. So, not bad right another $20 plus, I can get the contacts already.

But yesterday, my mother and I were out having lunch and we thought she should try looking for a handbag she wants. So, I thought, I'll help her look and look and look and kabaam! My eyes met it. It's brown skin and I knew it was love at first sight. But, you see, a Renoma always ranges 100plus to 300plus and I will never spend that much on a bag. Okay, maybe not now but the point is, I have a goal in mind which is to get my contacts.

So, since the bag would definitely be out of my league, what harm can checking out the price do, right?

It was going for $29 and my mom and I was like, "Oh maybe they left a 1 in front of it," but apparently not. Cause remember the $30 I had? Now, I have $1 left.

Can you say 'bodoh'?

But not really bodoh la cause it was as good as stealing it and it is so gorgeous, I just had to. Now I have to wait for another week before I get the contacts. And my mom still can't find a handbag. HAHA. I told you I'm just that good.

You should try earning your own money, it just makes you want to spend other people's money.

You know, I was thinking and feeling.

And thinking and feeling again real hard.

And I've come to the conclusion that maybe, just maybe, I'm in love.

No please don't take me seriously cause half of the time I don't even know what I feel. I can't even tell the need to shit from menstrual cramp so I don't deserve to be taken seriously. Only because I tell you not to.

And you see, when it comes to hating, I'm the champion but when it comes to liking someone, I just can't do it that well.

Like I call people I really care about as "losers". But if you get this from me once in a while and there's no consistency, that means you are a loser. No two way about that.

I don't even know why I'm telling you all these but I think my heart skips a beat a lot now and honestly, it's getting uncomfortable.

But, please don't tell anybody, I'm enjoying this a tiny tad.

Now, who wants to be hated by me?

I couldn't find Bobby today :(

I'm really sad.

Thank god I still have hamsters to make fun of.

Okay bye.

Oh, eat your fibre please people. Take it from me.

It's only the first week of school and I feel like I've been doing this since forever. School is so exhausting. And I hate it.

But I guess you already knew.

Anyway, today is my father's birthday! Oh technichally it was Friday la but anyway, you know it is so hard to find a place to celebrate his birthday. Like for example, on my mom's we always go to swensens cause she really likes it there. And my birthday, well, mine is the easiest cause I don't care where we go as long as it's small and simple. And it really helps if you hate the idea of getting older cause your mood is dampened and wherever you go, it does not matter cause you're just praying you'll be in attendance for your next birthday.

So, it was supposed to be a surprise dinner for him and my mother and I couldn't decide where to go so she called him and told him she's not cooking and all. And my father, being my father, said, "anywhere also can eat la". Then we couldn't decide on where to go and because I had to call him a million times, even a bodoh knows what's going on la.

In the end he wanted to go Simpang to eat chili crab. No cake. His fried rice and chili crab. That's how a real man celebrate.

Anyway, I was about to blog about how rotten my day was but, something happened really pleasant happened on the way home!

So you remember how I said I've always wanted a cat?

There was this stray cat- actually he isn't that stray cause he (I'm assuming it has penis) and I always see each other when I go to school in the morning and I always said hello to it so we already have a thang going.

So I saw Bobby (that's the name I gave him) again on the way home and I said hello. Next thing I know, the cutest thing was behind me until we reached home. And honestly, I was so afraid my mother wouldn't let me play with him and all but because I'm Ama, I ignored her while she nagged.

So I gave Bobby a bowl of water and like a minute later, my mother came complete with a bowl of milk and bread for Bobby. I honestly think my mother has difficulty understanding herself too.

Dad and Mom: Why you call him Bobby? How you know he's a boy?
Me: I call all animals Bobby. If he's a girl, I'll call it Boobie.

Happy birthday ba! You dont even know my blog url.

This is Bobby. Or maybe Boobie.

I cannot believe I'm going to school at 630am tomorrow.

Usually, I'm only up and about 6 hours later. Now, tell me how I'm supposed to do things that I normally do in school when for the past approx 2 months, my brain only starts functioning at noon.

Have I by any chance told you how much I hate school?

I hope I don't get lost while on the way tomorrow.

Good bye late nights, good bye lazing around, good bye life.

No, but seriously. Lets hope I get my shit together this year. Lets hope I'll remember there's A levels waiting for me in 1o months.

Oh, this is gonna be a looooooooooong year.

p.s i did about 82% of my hol hw. guess where the majority of the 18% rests on?

My skin is so itchy.

So so itchy.

It's so itchy, i want to scratch it and watch as blood flows out of the wounds.

But that would hurt so much. Okay maybe no scratching.

Anyway, I cried when Jim died on Ghost Whisperer. Please tell me someone else cried too cause I'm having some chemical imbalance. I cry when I hear good, uplifting songs, when people win something, when I see the news coverage on Gaza, when somebody else's husband died in a purely fictional show.

But I couldn't cry when somebody walked out of my life or when getting my skin burnt.

Something is wrong with me. OMG. I'm gonna die.

Please ignore me. The itch is getting unbearable, I need to distract myself.

What did you have for lunch? Oh wow. That sounds disgusting. I hope it tasted better than it sounds.

Anyway, I was thinking of not sleeping tonight and just watch youtube. The thing is, I know I would scratch my face once I'm asleep and there's not a thing I can do once it starts bleeding.

So, to counter this problem, we shld get to the root of the problem. Thus, the solution of not sleeping.

Are you bored now reading on things that don't matter to you? Cos, I'm quite bored typing out my thoughts.

Will update the links soon and reply the tags. Haven't done that for a while.

See you later, alligator!

The surgery promised the looks of Halle Berry.

And look at what happened to me...

This was right after the surgery and my eyes and face became so swollen, I had trouble carrying my head and opening my eyes while walking out.

So, anyway, remember how I was so excited practically counting the hours to the surgery? You know what, that was stupid. And dumb. And involved no infliction of pain of any sort on the skin or on the mind. The surgery however, was the anti-thesis cause it was brilliant and fucking painful.

I say fucking cause the word "too", "extremely" or anything of that nature does not come even 10 miles to the real pain I felt. You know how I feel about profanities. (HAHA.)

And have I mentioned how scheming and cunning these dermatologists are?

During my previous consultation, they told me the laser would be painless and I wouldn't have to worry about feeling my skin actually burning while I just sit there and do nothing. I became suspicious cause lets face it, good surgery and no pain, now that doesn't come around everyday. So he explained, they will apply a cream over my affected skin and after 1 hour, a pain-free laser surgery will be on the way.

Still, too good to be true right?

But I was too deluded to get my skin problem solved and I thought, this surgery would be so easy, I can do my 539482309482 Physics MCQ holiday homework while he lasers my face.

Now, now. Tell me if you ever had gotten 'cream' injected into your skin and the idea of injecting does not make you a) wanna run out of the centre and leave your parents clueless and b) feel pain all over the body even at places they won't be touching.

I am actually pretty good with injections but never had one on the face before and didn't really plan to for the rest of my life.

That's what I got. Instead of cream being applied on my skin, I had anaesthetic (i cant be bothered if there's spelling error) injected into my face. And no, not once, not twice but 4 bottles of it.

So ordeal's over right? Cause the injection means painless laser surgery right?

My ass. I could feel the intense heat from the laser, alright. And I jolted everytime it touched my skin and the doctor thought I was having a shock but the truth was, I could feel every joule of heat touching my skin and not just touching, burning, burning till I was looking down at myself lying down on the bed from the top of the room.

Okay, that didn't happen. But it would make a good story.

What happened was, I just shouted and go "ooh ooh, i can feel that" and when the pain became torture, I asked, "is it supposed to be this painful cause i think i may be damaged permanently".

In the end, they gave me 8 bottles of that useless chemical cause first, what the hell happened to painless surgery cause I could smell the burning of skin while I laid down waiting for the firemen to barge into the doors any minute and the terrifying sound of the laser wasn't helping (it sounds like.. "whoooooosh" really loudly) and second, there was no way I could have done my Physics MCQ in that kind of environment.

But the best part is this,

Doctor: On a scale of 1-10, how painful is this? *lasers off my skin, prentending not to sense my discomfort*

Me: Oooh, ouch, I feel that. Urm.. 12.

Moral of the story: With such intolerable pain, tummy tuck, butt lift and all that is out of the question.


And I can't be outdoors for 2 weeks. Just in time for school. Just nice for me to complete my homework.

something tells me i will regret putting these extreme makeover pictures cause they're just too gorgeous.

I'm a little late on this but HAPPY NEW YEAR!

I used to have so much excitement for new year cause I regarded it as an opportunity to start afresh and what is new year without your endless list of resolutions right. Like, I just write things on and on almost in a trance like I've forgotten I am not Ultraman and as though I really would work my ass off to fulfil these resolutions.

This is coming from a girl who finds bathing an utter chore.

So anyway, went cycling with the family today and that was nice. Really nice. Only that I made them walk all the way from Macs to the East Coast eating area.

Oh tomorrow is my surgery! I've been waiting for it for a long time and honestly, I'm a tad terrified but you see, I've been wanting this like my whole life so that alone should keep me alive.

I need to stop blogging now cause my thighs hurt and my calves aching.

Lets hope 2009 kicks ass.

Toodles darlings!