Goodbye or Hello?

Today is the last day of PAE and who would have thought that saying goodbye still is the hardest thing even if you only know one another for roughly 2 months? Who would have thought that the 12 people around me; my CGmates would be of so much interest to me when 2 months ago during orientation, not even cheering the House cheers humored me a teeny bit? Who would have thought after all the negative vibes I have towards this college, 2 months later, there is no other college I rather be?

Certainly not I.

Like you would probably have known by now, I am not exactly the best at bidding farewell neither am I the one who can easily let it go and move on, pretending all the laughters and annoyance I felt once upon a time, has no effect on me whatsoever. So, I have a feeling this time, thing is not that different either.

I really want to talk about my CGmates but I'll do it on another post when I receive the pictures from Eileen. But just know that, these are the best people I have met in college and I'm really glad I know them.

Anyway, tomorrow is the posting of JAE- the real shit, yaww! Hah. I had put TJC (Sci) as my first choice because that college has always been and will always just be a fantasy for as long as I shall live. It's just there for me to see and admire from far but not really close enough for me to touch and feel it's brilliance. I had always wanted to be a student there but we know, this is life and in life, you'll never get what you want so I have learnt to cope with that now.

Second choice is the more practical one- MJC (Sci). Half of me is not worried that MJ will reject me because they cannot do that since my net L1R5 is better than their COP and I can come in even without loyalty points. But, another half of me, the more paranoid one says that chances are MJ will reject me because I'm a traitor because I put them as second choice. Does not make sense right? But, you know, the things I am able to convince myself to believe in times like this.

Worst case scenario is that TJC will not even look at me, MJC rejected me and I am posted to my 3rd choice- either SA or AC. I will not really mind AC since a few of my friends are there.

Hah. Please la, just give me MJC. Just give me something that I want for once la.